Before Gluskab of the Abenaki made the world safe for humans, the Monts–mountain-like children of the creator and Gaia–walked and talked like men. Despite being mystical children of ancient spirits, I reckon they got lonely like men, too–because, they got together often to play a game called Ranges. Standing hand-in-hand, teams competed in casting the biggest shadows. Yes, it was painfully boring, but hockey wouldn’t be invented for millennia and they didn’t have cable–so it was popular. So popular that its inventors, Birki and his brother Jaya, were rewarded a kingdom to share.
The Great Coronation Confrontation
Monts from everywhere came for the brothers’ coronation. A Ranges tournament was to be held, followed by a feast of fresh Catamount (no stir fry jokes, it’s an important plot point). Now, as is often the case when bands of ancient, elemental creatures get together–you know how it is–they had too much wine and a dispute broke out about Ranges official rules. Himy (the tallest Mont) argued that biggest shadow meant highest, while Andy’s team (from far south) argued it meant longest. For an official ruling, they took it to the game’s inventors, the soon-to-be brother kings.
Jaya, being taller, confidently answered “higher”, just as his older brother answered “longer.” A mildly embarrassing contradiction, that started a calm discussion as each pointed out how the other had misunderstood a fairly obvious rule. A discussion that quickly escalated, because if one thing’s true of Monts, it’s that you can’t move them. You can go over, around–even through them–but you’ll never move them. So neither brother would budge from his position. And the argument raged on until most of the guests, bored, went home to wait on the official ruling. And the coronation was put on hold.
The Cat’s Divide
Now the wise–many say handsome–Catamount, saw a way off the menu and spoke. “You Monts aren’t aware, but I am a master of gamesmanship.” Which was true. “Let’s settle this with a King Contest. Both of you create a crown. One will, undoubtedly, be more magnificent and its wearer will be king and decide the rules. If, somehow, you can’t agree on a winning crown, I volunteer to judge. With no dog in this fight, I’m impartial.” An odd choice of words, since dogs hadn’t been created yet, but the rest made sense. So they went with it.
The brothers stormed off to create their thrown-winning crowns. But as Birki walked, he cooled off. Being right about a stupid game wasn’t worth losing his brother. Why not play with two sets of rules? Set up two leagues? And then, at the end of a season, the champions of both leagues could square off in a seven-game series. Alternating rules. No one could ever argue with that, could they? Just call it the Gaia Series. Problem solved. And it would have been, had his path back not taken him past the clever–dare we say brilliant–Catamount.
After hearing Birki’s plan, the Catamount shook his nearly perfect head while crafting another ingenious way out of being dinner. “Birki,” he said, “Your brother’s name, Jaya, means victory. Yours means birch wood. The younger Monts are naïve and think winning is his birthright. Those young, green Monts will line up behind Jaya. So if you bring up this idea, they’re gonna laugh. You have to take victory and make it a part of you. It’s the only way.” With that, a dejected Birki fled to the edge of the kingdom to think and the handsome Catamount lived another day.
A Clash of Crowns
The Day of Crowns came. Jaya presented first. Taller, he could just reach the clouds and had pulled one from the sky, covering it with white crystals that fell down his back. The Monts cheered, unknowingly supporting the Catamount’s clever ruse. You can’t blame them, he had a cloud resting on his head, it’s impressive. An angry Birki then presented a crown made of every tree in the forest, vast and beautiful. But before any could react, he put it on and yelled, “This forest is my crown, it is called Victory. And no Mont can take Victory from me.”
Now Jaya, too was enraged. And a scuffle broke out that threatened to destroy the whole kingdom, until the voice of the Catamount–silky might describe it best–calmed them. “Fellas, you agreed that if you couldn’t pick a winner, I would be The Judge. Now, I’m surprised at anyone, but this appears to be the case. It will be hard, both are beautiful, but I will bear the burden. Perhaps if you untie me and I can walk a bit, the decision will come easier.” Blinded by the need to win, the brothers let their coronation feast stroll off.
“I’ll go North,” the charming Catamount said over his shoulder. “You two wait, here.” and disappeared. The brothers, still angry, went to opposite sides of the Kingdom. Birki to the East, sat with Victory forest at his side. Jaya to the west with the Green Monts, frightened of Birki, falling in behind him. There they sat. Too stubborn and proud to speak to one another, time turned them both to stone. Forever apart, the story of the Monts–mountains as people call them was forgotten and only their names remained. And the Catamount was never seen in the Kingdom again.
Fast Forward.
In the summer of 2012 a business decision was made that would reunite these mythical brothers. It was business. Prompted by a phone call. Or that’s what they would have you believe. But maybe, just maybe, softened by age or guilt the Catamount whispered to two boys in their dreams–a spirit guide of sorts–and shaped the course of their lives. Boys who, maybe, grew up to be respected men–business owners, financial partners. The kind of men who don’t talk of spirit cats guiding decisions–well, not without being considered even crazier, at least. Who would believe them? How could anyone? This is the real world, right? Men aren’t guided to right ancient wrongs. Even if it was true, they could never tell.
And what of the charismatic, clever Catamount, the Judge? Well, I’m not talking either.
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